Broken Wings
by samandjackshipper
Summary: Response to the challenge set by Carolineoneill over at the gateworld forums. You can see the challenge in the first part of the story.Sam's getting married and Jack's seeing Kerry. Will their hearts lead them down the right path?
1. Though A Candle Burns In My Heart

_Challenge (set by carolineoneill over at the gateworld forums): _

_**Sam: Tell me. Have we grown so far apart that you couldn't tell my you were seeing someone? Daniel and Teal'c know about her, yet you couldn't tell me! Were you planning on bringing her to the wedding?**_

Jack: I'm not coming to the wedding!  
And the only reason Daniel and Teal'c know anything about Kerri is she had to interview them about the Trust.

Sam: That doesn't answer my question about us!

Jack: There is no us, and by the looks of things never has been!  


_**Disclaimer: I own NONE of the Stargate Charatcers, names, places, etc. This fiction is intended PURELY for entertainment purposes! No copyright infringement intended!**_

Chapter 1 : Though A Candle Burns In My Heart... There's Nobody Home

**_As soon go kindle fire with snow, as seek to quench the fire of love with words. WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE_**

Brigadier General Jack O'Neill sat at his desk working his way through the seemingly ever increasing pile of files that sat atop of his desk. Personnel files, mission debriefings, requests for scientific equipment grants… paperwork really was_ not_ his forte.

'Where's Walter when you need him?' he asked himself.

'Oh right…' a part of his mind chided, '…probably at home asleep like every other sane person seeing as it's gone two in the morning!'

Jack groaned and dropped his pen on the desk, the sound of it ostensibly louder than it should be, the 'clatter' reverberating off the walls of his office. He sank back into the desk chair rotating his neck to alleviate some of the tension that had built up over the course of the past several hours.

It was times like these that he regretted taking the position as leader of the SGC. Sure the job had its benefits; the better parking space, the increased salary, more power (not that he was a Napoleonic power-monger like some people were… or rather had been). He remembered the smiling face of the little doctor who had become like a fifth member of SG1. He let the memories, the happiness… and the pain wash over him for a few seconds, before shutting it away in the recesses of his mind. If he dwelled on it too much, dwelled on all the people he had gotten killed, all the loved ones who had died, he wouldn't be able to get out of bed in the mornings.

He shook his body and set himself the task of trying to complete as much of the paperwork as possible and that by 0300 he would leave and (regardless of how much was done) return to it in the morning… or later that day… whenever it was it didn't really matter, the pile would have increased by the time he got back to it like it always seemed to do. It could double in size in the blink of an eye. Jack often suspected some alien mischief was at work… if only!

As he set to signing off on SG-11's latest mission report, his damned pen ran out.

"Oh for cryin' out loud" he accused the empty room. He pulled open the top drawer of his desk and as he searched for a pen of the same colour, his eyes fell on something he had tried to forget… thinking that if he left it in his desk, let it stay there, untouched, then maybe it would go away.

He tentatively picked up the cream coloured piece of card…

_Samantha Carter & Pete Shanahan_

_request the pleasure of your company at their wedding on_

_Saturday March 12th 2005 at 11.00am_

_St Peter's Church, Colorado Springs._

Jack let out a breath he didn't realise he had been holding. The day he'd found the invitation on his desk was the day his whole world had came crumbling down around him. All the hopes, all the dreams shattered into a million pieces. He'd always hoped that one day they could finally be together, finally get the 'happily ever after' cliché that he felt deep down they were surely owed after all this time?

When he had found out she was dating someone he had tried to act all nonchalance about it. He'd asked his name, even made a joke about her 'speeding again' when she told him he was a cop… hell, joking was all he could do at that point, it always had been. Whenever he was in a situation that made him uncomfortable he made a joke. She used to laugh at his jokes, rewarding him with one of her dazzling smiles that made him go weak at the knees.

He'd also tried to act like he was okay about it, telling her it was great she was seeing someone and that he was happy that she was happy, when all he'd really wanted to do was tell her that he hated the idea of her being with anyone other than him.

But he'd tried to deal with it, the same way he had for the past eight years, by pushing his feelings deep down inside of him and trying to get on with his life.

He'd accepted that she was moving on with her life and maybe he should too… but it wasn't that easy. How can you put out a fire that had burned for so long and been through so much but never died out?

The fire had started to dwindle when she'd shown him the engagement ring Pete had given her. She told him she hadn't said yes and he retorted with 'and yet you haven't said no'… although the fire still burned it had diminished slightly, the slight hope that she wouldn't accept Pete's proposal fuelling his hope.

When he had opened the invitation, he actually felt his heart break. Everyone always talked about it in a metaphorical manner. Obviously they had never had their heart broken… he felt the pain, it was like a rusty jagged knife was speared into his heart some sadistic bastard were twisting the knife after every word he read on the invitation…

Three days later he'd started seeing Kerri.

He placed the invitation back in the desk draw and slammed it shut with such force that he knocked the picture frame on his desk over and it cracked upon impacting with the floor.

'To hell with paperwork', he thought. What he needed now was a stiff drink and to collapse into bed, and try and forget about all of this… just for a few hours.

As he stood up and went to grab his jacket off the back of his seat he heard a knock at his office door. Glancing at the clock on his desk he saw it was 02.28.

'Who the hell is here at this time' he spoke quietly to himself but spoke aloud "Come in?"

"Sir?" Sam spoke softly as she entered the office.

"Carter! What are you still doing here? It's nearly two thirty!" Jack spoke, trying to avoid her eyes, just like he had been for the past few weeks.

"I could say the same thing to you sir." She said with a small smile that he did not see.

Sam hated this. Ever since she had left the invitation on his desk he had acted coldly towards her, never meeting her gaze, only coming to see her when it was work related, and only _then_ when it was urgent.

"I've been working on the analysis of the ancient device on Dakara. I was just on my way to get some coffee and I heard a crash come from your office." Sam told him.

"Well as you can see, everything's fine, you can go back to your analysis now." Jack spoke coldly and he went to walk past her.

Sam had had enough.

"Is this how its going to be from now on… the only contact you make with me I when its work related and absolutely necessary!"

"I haven't had any other reason to come and see you…" Jack told her in an icy tone that made Sam's blood run cold.

"You never needed a reason to come and see me in the past." Sam told him quietly, trying to remain calm.

"Yeah well, thing's change." Jack said as he went to walk past her.

"I know…" Sam told him and then decided to take the plunge and ask him what she'd been wanting to ever since she'd found out.

"Tell me. Have we grown so far apart that you couldn't tell my you were seeing someone? Daniel and Teal'c know about her, yet you couldn't tell me! Were you planning on bringing her to the wedding?"

That stopped Jack in his path, hand hovering above the doorknob.

"I'm not coming to the wedding! And the only reason Daniel and Teal'c know anything about Kerri is she had to interview them about the Trust." He informed her.

"That doesn't answer my question about us!" Sam spoke holding back the tears.

Jack wheeled around to face her, and for the first time in three weeks looked her in the eyes. "There is no us, and by the looks of things never has been!"

Jack regretted it the very second it came out of his mouth. The devastated look on her face causing the little bastard to twist the rusty knife again. He'd just been so angry and hurt that he'd said the first thing that came to his mind and he never regretted saying anything so much in his life like he did now.

"Sam.. I didn't m…" Jack tried to speak but she cut him off.

"NO! You've made your feelings pretty clear. Good night… _sir _." Sam spoke, the tears falling from her cheeks as she left the room in a hurry.

Jack had never heard her say the word 'sir' with such hatred. He couldn't believe he'd told her there had 'never been an us'. It was something he'd never believed, which was why he was so shocked he'd said it.

A glint of light caught his eye and he looked down at the floor at the broken photo frame. He bent and picked it up. The photo was of SG-1 taken at their last team night. They all looked so happy, arms around each other, smiling faces… now distorted by the large crack in the glass frame that diagonally spanned the width of the frame.

_**Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable. BRUCE LEE**_


	2. Pain Makes You Forget

Chapter 2: Pain Makes You Forget… Friends Make You Remember

A few minutes after Sam had fled from his office Jack seemed to regain use of his legs which had felt like lead paper weights as he'd watched her leave. He raced to her lab but she was nowhere to be seen. He jumped into the elevator and pressed the button for the top floor, repeatedly pressing the button as if that would make the elevator move faster. As soon as the elevator stopped and the doors opened he ran for the doors turning sideways to get out of the door as quick as possible.

He raced to the airman on duty at the entrance.

"Has Colonel Carter left yet?" he tried not to seem too anxious… that would give rise to the rumours he knew circulated around the SGC about their relationship. The rumours had died down recently when word had spread of Colonel Carter's upcoming marriage.

"Yes sir, about four or five minutes ago."

Jack sighed quietly, trying not to show his disappointment. "Thank you airman."

"Yes sir."

Jack walked back to the elevator and it opened immediately and he stepped into it.

Midway through his ride back down to his office he suddenly swore loudly running his long slender fingers through his short silvery hair and without warning lashed his foot out and kicked the side of the elevator. The sound reverberated in the enclosed space like a gong and he immediately regretted it, the pain in his foot shooting through him, but for a second, the pain he felt in his heart dissipated a little. A thought flashed through his mind and he reeled his left hand back and smashed it against the side of the elevator. The pain shot through him but for some sadistic reason it felt good… well, not good necessarily… but it caused him to momentarily forget about the emotional pain inside of him. He hit the wall again… and again… and again.

After several punches to the metal elevator wall, he pulled his hand back and looked at it, there wasn't any blood but he knew he'd have a hell of a bruise there within a few hours.

He tried moving his fingers but they resisted, pain shooting up his arm. Jack turned and leant forwards and pressed his forehead against the elevator doors.

'when did life get so screwed up?' he thought to himself. He was so busy trying to place the time that he didn't register the elevator stop and the doors open and he fell forwards and landed in an ungainly heap on the floor… right next to Daniel's feet.

"Jack! What happened!" Daniel said as he reached down and helped his friend up. Jack deferred the offered hand.

"Ugh… I'm fine." He said softly. He tried to stand up on his own but his injured hand wouldn't let him and he gave a small cry of pain. Daniel ignored his refusal of help and lifted him to his feet.

"Are you okay?" Daniel asked him.

"I think I just made the biggest mistake of my life Daniel." Jack confessed. Daniel looked at him and he was shocked by the pain and emptiness he saw in Jack's eyes.

"Come on, lets get some coffee and we'll talk."

"Okay" Jack mumbled and started walking with Daniel towards his office.

This really shocked Daniel. Over that past few weeks Daniel had tried to get Jack to talk to him but he'd always told him he was fine. What had happened to make him suddenly agree to talk to him?

About ten minutes later they were sat in Daniel's office. Neither of them had spoken so Daniel decided to break the ice.

"So… wanna tell me why you think you made the biggest mistake of your life?" Daniel spoke softly. He had an idea what this may have been about but wanted Jack to tell him first.

Jack was staring absent-mindedly into his coffee, seemingly not hearing Daniel so he raised his voice a little when he spoke.

"Jack!"

Jack raised his eyes to meet his then dropped them again to the steaming dark brown liquid in his mug. Daniel opened his mouth to speak but Jack got there first.

"Carter came to see me earlier… we… argued, she was mad at me for not telling her about Kerry… I was mad with her 'cos… well, you know…" Jack looked up at Daniel briefly.

Daniel didn't like where this was headed. He knew this was going to be a huge 'foot in mouth' kind of deal, there was no-way it would be physical… he knew Jack could never lay a hand on Sam in anger.

Jack looked down and covered his eyes with his hand, his elbow resting on the table.

"She asked me about 'us' and I told her…" Jack let out a breath, "I told her there wasn't an 'us' and obviously there never had been"

Jack moved his coffee away and let his head sink to the table with a thud.

"Jack… I can't belie…" Daniel started.

"I know" Jack interrupted and sat up again. "I don't know why I said it. I didn't mean it… I was just… I was just so angry. God I'm such an idiot!"

Daniel sighed. "Listen to me Jack… you guys have been through so much, I know that you really care for each other and that's why I hate seeing you both like this. You're both miserable."

"Carter is not miserable… she's getting married for cryin' out loud!"

"Yes she is Jack… you can't see it because you haven't been looking. There was a time when you'd be able to tell she was upset as soon as she walked in the door, even if the rest of us couldn't see it. I'm surprised Pete can't see it…"

"How do you know he can't?"

"I've talked to Sam… she says he doesn't realise, he doesn't know her… not like you do. She's surprised at herself that she's even going through with the wedding…" Daniel confessed.

"What!" Jack spoke, stunned.

"She doesn't want to marry him Jack… she's doing it because she thinks it's the right thing to do… and she also told me she thought things were over between you both. When she came to you after Pete proposed…and now…"

"Well it's not like I could do anything! Have you forgotten about the rules and damned regulations!" Jack spoke, his voice rising.

"I know Jack…" Daniel paused before he spoke again.

"I want you to tell me the truth, not talking about rules or regs… If you had the chance for you two to be together, would you take it?"

"Of course…" Jack said softly.

"Then go, talk to her."

"She's marrying Pete…" Jack spoke, almost as if he couldn't bear to say his name.

"For god sake Jack she doesn't want to! And as far as the whole rules and regulations thing goes… I know you've thought about retiring… they've hired civilians to run the SGC before so you'd still be part of the programme, still be able to do what you're doing now… but you'd be happy…wouldn't you?

"Yeah" Jack whispered.

"Now go talk to Sam before I drag you there myself!"

"How? What am I supposed to say to Pete? 'Hi Pete, how you doing? your fiancée in? I just need to have a word with her tell her not to marry you because I love her…'" Jack retorted.

"He's in Denver tonight visiting friends… will be for the next couple of days." Daniel told him.

Jack looked like he was mulling things over in his head and slowly a small smile crept across his face… it felt good to smile, something he hadn't done in nearly a month.

"Thanks Danny-boy." Jack clapped him on the shoulder and ran for the door.

A lone figure emerged from the shadows of the room.

"I believe you were successful in convincing O'Neill of the right thing to do Dr Jackson." Teal'c spoke warmly and hopefully.

"Yeah I hope you're right Teal'c… either that or we just royally screwed everything up."

"Well for both their sakes let us hope it is not the latter."

"Yeah, I hope so."

TBC


	3. Love Is Never Having To Say You're Sorry

Sam sat curled up on the sofa in a black tank top with black sweat pants on watching the television, but she did not see what was on it. To her, it was all flickering lights, rushes of colour and inaudible low mumblings. She had sat down with the intention of watching something to take her mind off the morning's events. Not that there was much on at twenty to four in the morning. She couldn't sleep… there were too many things on her mind, and every time she closed her eyes she saw Jack's face as he told her there had 'never been an 'us''.

She knew deep down that he hadn't truly meant it. He'd just been angry, the tension of the past month's events finally causing him to loose it… and in all honesty she didn't blame him for it one bit.

She had hated herself for what she had done to him. Ever since she had told him about Pete proposing he had barely talked to her and she wished she could go back and give him more of a chance, try to talk to him asking him more than "what about you? If things had been different…" Thinking about it now it was practically a rhetorical question. It had been her subtle way of asking him, 'have we got a future together?'.

She hadn't come out and asked him directly because she was afraid of what the answer might be. Even though they had been through so much together, after everything they had confessed, she had a feeling deep down inside that she couldn't shake. A little voice in her mind spoke up every time she thought about asking Jack if they had a future together, the main thing she kept thinking was, 'was it better to hold onto the fantasy, dream about the possibility that there would be a future for them both… or ask him and risk destroying everything she had been dreaming about for the past eight years on the chance that he would say they couldn't ever be together'.

When she had found out from Daniel about him seeing Kerry, she had been hurt for more than one reason. She felt hurt that Daniel and apparently Teal'c knew about their relationship, but Jack had obviously decided not to tell her. She felt hurt by the mere fact that he was seeing someone… and then felt overwhelmingly guilty and angry at herself for thinking that… she was seeing Pete, hell, she was marrying Pete, and he had every right to see someone else. But the thing that hurt most, was that she was sure they no longer had a future together.

She hadn't expected him to still be on base this morning. He was the one usually making jokes about how _she_ never left. When she found him in his office after going to inspect what the crash had been and he had given her the cold shoulder she had lost it, finally asking him everything she had wanted to ask.

When she had asked him about 'us' and he had responded the way he did, she felt emotionally and almost physically sick. It was one thing to tell them there wasn't an 'us'… but to say there never had been… suddenly the room had become too small, too claustaphobic and she had fled dismissing his attempts to apologise.

Now she sat, eyes red from crying. She was glad Pete wasn't here to see her. How would it look if he came in and saw her in tears. How could she explain that her CO had just broken her heart… and yet… she still loved him.

In that instance she knew what she had to do… she'd been thinking about it for the past couple of weeks but realising how much she had hurt Jack, how every time she thought of marrying Pete she felt guilty inside… like she was betraying Jack somehow… she realised that she had to call off the marriage to Pete. Even though she and Jack apparently had no future together, she realised that she would rather be alone the rest of her life, than be married to someone other than Jack.

Pete was due home in two days time and she knew that she would tell him then that she couldn't marry him. She didn't know what to tell him though, she couldn't tell him the truth for fear that he might tell someone at the SGC and she couldn't risk Jack getting in trouble or at the worst being court-martialled.

As she sat mulling over in her head what she would say to Pete she heard a knock at her door. Looking at the clock atop of the fireplace she saw it was just gone 4am… Thinking it was Pete and that he had forgotten or lost his house keys she got up and went to the door, checking her appearance in the mirror for the obvious signs that she had been crying. Her eyes were a little puffy and red but she could say it was because she'd been woken up. Pete had seen her after she'd been crying on a couple of occasions in the past but hadn't noticed. That was something that caused her to think hard about how well he knew her… he couldn't even tell when she'd been crying for god sake!

She went to the door and opened it gently and was shocked to see Jack standing on her doorstep, partially hidden by the darkness that still resided as the sun began to rise on the horizon.

"Sir!" she was shocked she'd managed to keep with the military protocol.

"Hey" he spoke softly and paused before stepping out of the shadows. His face was soft and gentle and for the first time in over three weeks he looked into her eyes the way he used to. "I'm sorry." He spoke with such tenderness and regret that Sam felt her heart constrict.

"No…" Sam said in a whisper. Jack was just about to speak, getting the wrong impression from her 'no', thinking she didn't want to hear what he said but she placed her finger on his lips and stepped back so he could come inside. She shut the door behind her and turned, leaning back against it for support before speaking again. "… I'm the one who should be apologising…. You had every right to say that to me."

"No I didn't… I shoul…" Jack stopped abruptly and then stepped closer to her. "Have you been crying?" He placed his hand to her cheek and brushed his thumb under her eye. Sam closed her eyes as soon as he touched her cheek, the feel of his hand on her cheek was warm and soft and she gently pressed her face into the warm embrace of his hand.

She brought her hand up and took his hand in hers, she brought it round to her lips and placed a soft kiss to his palm. She opened her eyes and they immediately locked with his.

"You had every right to say those things to me because I deserved them… I _know_ that I hurt you when I told you about Pete proposing to me. I never meant to hurt you. You have to know that I wanted to give us a chance to be together but… I knew it wasn't possible, not while we were both still in the military. We'd waited eight years and I guess I was so scared Jack… I was scared that if I asked you outright if we had a future together and you said 'no'…" a tear slipped down her cheek and Jack brushed it away with his thumb.

"Hey… hey, hey. Shh. Please don't cry… it kills me when you cry." Jack whispered and pulled him to her in a tight embrace.

Jack spoke while holding her, his mouth just above her ear. "how could you think that? You know I'm not exactly the brightest star in the sky, and that day when you asked me 'what about us, if things had been different…' i know my reply wasn't exactly clear, but i didn't know whether you were being… well… subtle and asking me if you wanted to be together." Jack felt Sam smile briefly against his shoulder.

"Then I saw the invitation and I knew I'd lost you for good."

Sam pulled back slightly so she could look into his eyes.

"Tell me the truth…If I had said to you then, 'do you want us to be together... do we have a future?' what would you have said?" Sam asked him tentatively.

"I would have said 'yes'. I would have told you that that was all I dreamed about, how all my dreams were filled with you. How every time I saw you I wanted to tell you how beautiful you are. I wanted to tell you how often I dreamed of kissing you, showing you how much I wanted you, how I wanted to go to sleep every night with you in my arms, and wake up with you still in my arms every morning."

Sam was crying silently now as Jack reached up and placed both his hands on the sides of her face.

"I would have told you that I love you… I have done ever since you walked into the briefing room and that I would always love you, even after I die I will _never _stop loving you."

Their foreheads were resting against each other and their lips were so close they could feel their breath's mingling but Sam stilled them both with a soft "wait"

"Nooo," Jack crooned but pulled back faintly, "No waiting… we've waited eight years…" Jack spoke, pouting slightly.

"I want to… god knows _I've_ dreamed about it. But I want to tell Pete the engagement's off first. I want to be able to tell him that nothing happened between us while we were together." Sam told him.

"Mmmm, okay." Jack whispered. "Hey, we've waited eight years… wants a few more days right? I should probably go then, I don't know how much longer my restraint is gonna last" Jack said with a sly grin, their arms still wrapped around each other.

"That's what you call restraint!" Sam whispered, smiling. "Well I can't wait to see what it's like when you finally loose that so called restraint!"

"I'll bet you would" Jack said with a smile pulling her body closer to his but not trying to kiss her.

"Okay… I'm gonna go…"

Sam closed her eyes as she spoke. "Okay" then opened them again.

"Pete gets back the day after tomorrow… I'll tell him then. I'll meet you in the park down by the river about sixteen hundred hours?"

"Okay…" Jack placed a soft kiss to her forehead. "I'll see you there. If you need me… just call." Jack opened the door and headed out.

"Jack wait…" Sam yelled after him in a hushed whisper trying not to wake the neighbours.

"How did you know Pete wasn't gonna be here?" Sam questioned.

"Daniel told me…" Jack said with a sly grin.

"Hmmm… remind me to thank him." She smiled at him as he got in his car and mouthed 'I love you'.

'I love you too' he replied silently with a soft grin as he turned and backed out of the drive.

**TBC**

1 more chapter to go! (and then possibly an epilogue)


	4. My Future Is With You

Sam was grateful for the week's downtime that SG-1 had been given. Not only did it give her time to think about what she might say to Pete, but for once, she actually left the base, tried to concentrate on normal, everyday things. She tried to focus on tidying up the house, watching the TV, working in the garden… but no matter how hard she tried, Jack's face kept popping up in her head, her body tingling at the memory of the sensations he caused in her, the thought that tomorrow, if things didn't go horribly wrong, she and Jack would be able to start their future together.

The afternoon had come a lot quicker than she had expected and she was in the middle of making herself a cup of coffee, pleased with her work around the house. It was amazing how dirty a house can get when you aren't around to clean it, instead you're off travelling to other worlds and engaging in battles that most people could not comprehend. She and Pete had practically been living together in her house but he wasn't exactly the most tidy of people and that bugged her. She made a genuine effort to keep the house tidy whenever she was actually at home, but Pete, who seemed to be living there more than Sam herself, rarely ever cleaned. That had bugged her but she had just thought she was being picky and therefore rarely mentioned it.

As she poured the coffee into the mug, set on sitting quietly for however long it took, and thinking about what to tell Pete when he came home, she heard a set of keys in the door and what shocked her was that her first fleeting thought was 'Jack's home', and for a second a smile crossed her face, then she realised that a. Jack didn't have a set of keys and b. Pete was the one who was actually expected home, all be it not for several hours.

Sam started to panic, she hadn't thought about what to say to him, how to break up with him… nothing. She heard to door open and then close. "Hey baby, you home?!"

"Pete?! I thought you weren't gonna be home for hours?" Sam tried to sound as calm as possible and tried to compose herself.

"Well I wanted to beat the traffic" Pete told her as he walked into the kitchen. He moved over to her and went to kiss her but she turned slightly so his lips met her cheek. "What's wrong baby?" He asked her, confused.

Sam took a deep breath and spoke as evenly as possible. "We need to talk."

"Okay, just let me go get changed" Pete told her and then turned and left the room before she had a chance to say anything more.

When she was alone in the room she ran her hands over her face, she hadn't expected him to be home so early and had thrown her completely off. She walked out of the kitchen and into the living room where she sat on the couch, feet curled under her, silently prying for this to be over soon while also trying to think of what to say to Pete. She was so lost in her thoughts that she didn't register Pete coming into the room.

"Sam? You in there?" Pete asked hr waving a hand in front of her face. She jumped slightly and spoke "Sorry…"

"So what did you wanna talk about?" Pete asked her, sitting down next to her.

She took a breath and faced him. "Please let me finish before you say anything" Sam pleaded.

"I can't o this anymore, I'm sorry Pete, I can't marry you. I thought I could but I can't. I can't give you everything you deserve, everything you want, and I just don't think that we're meant to be. You deserve better."

Pete didn't say anything for a few moments and his silence scared her. As she was about to ask him to say something Pete spoke quietly. "There's someone else isn't there." It wasn't really a question, more of a statement.

Sam was taken aback, she hadn't expected him to say that. She closed her eyes. "Yes… but I promise you that nothing has happened between us while you and I were together, I i promise /i ."

"Who is he?"

"I can't Pete… I'm sorry…"

Pete cut her off, "Come on Sam, you at least owe me his name!"

Sam couldn't tell him it was Jack, she couldn't risk Pete telling someone, someone who could get Jack into a hell of a lot of trouble. The Sam had an idea and hoped it would satisfy Pete. Hell she felt she al least owed him some semblance of the truth.

"His name's Jonathon." Pete didn't act like he knew who she was talking about.

"He's someone from my past." It was kind of true. Jack was her past, her present and her future.

"How long has this been going on?"

"Nothing's happened between us… but I know that I love him and that's why I can't marry you Pete. I'm sorry."

Pete breathed in deeply and closed his eyes before he spoke, "I guess all I can say is… I hope you get what you want."

"That's it?" Sam said shocked.

"What do you want? You want me to get down on my knees and beg?" Pete asked her looking at her intently

"God, no! Of course not! I just ... I thought you would react differently." Sam sighed.

Pete turned and walked for the front door and stopped before he opened it. "Goodbye, Sam." He said solemnly and opened the door and left.

When the door closed Sam felt guilty for it was like a huge weight had been lifted from her shoulders. She felt guilty for hurting Pete like she had… and yet, the knowledge that she and Jack could finally be together gave her a feeling inside like warm honey running through her.

Sam arrived at the park around 15:50 and seeing no sign of Jack she went to sit on the bench opposite the play park. She sat watching the children playing on the swing sets, laughing and screaming happily as they span on the roundabout and flew down the slide to land in the sand at the bottom.

One little girl caught her attention. She had her back to Sam and wore a long white dress, her long blonde curls hanging down her back. She reached the top of the ladder and ran across the bridge to the slide. As she sat down Sam saw her face and she let out a small gasp…

It was the same girl she had seen on the Prometheus. The girl flew down the slide and into the arms of a man at the bottom. He picked her up and spun her around and placed a loving kiss on her cheek. He turned and Sam's breath caught in her throat.

It was Jack, his hair slightly greyer but his body still the same muscular, lean shape it had always been.

Sam was confused, wondering what she was seeing, and then a woman walked over to Jack. She had short blonde hair and had quite a petite but strong frame. She reached up and placed a passionate kiss on Jack's lips and as she pulled back, Sam saw herself standing with Jack's arm around her and running her hand through the little girl's hair. Despite how far away they were Sam heard the little girl speak as if she were standing right next to her.

"I love you mummy. I love you Daddy"

Sam just stared at them in shock, her future self with Jack and their daughter. Someone walked across her line of vision and when they were gone… so was her future self. Sam blinked, wondering what had happened. She knew she had seen them, it had all seemed so real.

As she sat staring at the spot where she had seem them someone came up behind her and placed their hands over her eyes. They were soft, warm hands and she suddenly felt lips kiss the back of her neck and his low voice sent a pleasant shiver through her entire body.

"How did it go?" Jack asked her softly.

Sam turned and placed her lips close to his. "It's over… I'm all yours… forever if you'll have me?" Sam spoke in a whisper.

"Always… I love you… now and forever. Nothing will ever come between us again." Jack told her quietly, his arms encircling her waist.

"How did Kerry take it?" Sam asked, looking into his eyes, feeling like she could almost see straight into his soul.

"Oddly enough, pretty well… she even told me you and I deserved to be together. She could see it from the first time she saw us in the same room together, but she wanted us to come to our senses on our own." Jack told her.

"So, this is it… we're finally here…" Sam smiled

"Took us long enough" Jack grinned, "we should get a medal or something."

"Well you are the general now, you get to issue the medals."

"Not for long. I submitted my resignation yesterday."

"What! Already?!" Sam gasped.

"I didn't want anything to keep us apart." Jack said softly.

"How did the President take it?"

"Tried to talk me out of it of course. He didn't know the real reason I wanted to retire. We had a loooong conversation on the phone. He persuaded me tokeep my position as head of the SGC."

Sam stepped back shocked. "What?! But… I thought…"

Jack placed a finger to her lips softly. "I'm no longer military Sam… apparently I was considered invaluable to the programme by the Pentagon, so they appointed me as a civilian."

"And the President was okay with that?"

"I told him that was the only way they'd be able to keep me."

Sam let out a breath and smiled.

"So we're okay, no rules or regulations are gonna be broken if I… do…" Jack leaned forwards and brushed the tip of his nose against hers, his lips brushing against hers briefly, "…this…" Jack spoke barely above a whisper.

He caught her lips in between his. Sam felt something inside her escape… she was finally free… free to love Jack the way she had always dreamed of.

Sam responded, their passion mounting and they held each other close.

They broke the kiss, Jack running his hand through her hair.

"I love you Samantha."

"I love you Jack." Sam smiled and pulled him into an embrace.

Jack took Sam's hand and they turned to walk towards the park exit… "C'mon, we've gotta get started on making lots of little O'Neill's" Jack told her, a huge grin breaking out across his face.

Sam laughed and leant her head on his shoulder.

"What do you think of Grace O'Neill?"

Jack looked down into her eyes.

"I love it."

And they left the park, hand in hand, finally at peace, and they knew no matter what was ahead of them they had each other… and that was all that mattered.

I hope you liked it! Sorry it took so long to update. RL has been SO hectic. I'm off to Avalon in 8 days! SO EXCITED! YAY!

Please review!


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